One of the most popular stories in the New York Times today was “Backlash: Women Bullying Women at Work.”

This is news? All the long-time working women I know, me included, have invisible scars on our backs from the claws of a mean female co-worker or boss somewhere down the line. Some of us even have a knife wound or two.

Why do women do this to other women? The New York Times speculates that it could be the recession and lack of advancement driving women to treat other women badly. Oh pa-shaw, I say. We’ve always done that.

It’s in our nature to size each other up from head to toe and silently ask ourselves, “Can I take her?” Same as two dogs meeting – one is the sniffer, the other is the sniffee. Who decides who’s who? I don’t know. As the nuns say, it’s a mystery.

In the workplace, those roles are usually pretty clear cut. Just look at the org chart.

So if you’re the sniffer dominant doggy, here’s my advice to you: Don’t be mean to someone just because you can. No matter how much you think she needs to be taken down a notch and shown who’s boss, don’t ever humiliate her, especially not in public. The best boss I ever had was also the kindest. Caring deeply about her employees did not make her a wuss.

If you’re the sniffee doggy, here’s a tip: If your female boss keeps telling you you’re too nice, watch out. You’re fixing to land on your back with your paws in the air.

Here’s my advice to you, puppy: You know that badass look you get when your kids start acting up? That look that says, “Don’t mess with me, I am the mama and I will take you down”? Start cultivating that look at work.

Squinty eyes, hard upper lip. Sarah Palin and Hilary Clinton have perfected it to a “t”. Just look where it’s taken them.